Happy Birthday To Me!
That's right, it's my birthday! I'm sure the spontatnious celebrations and parades in my honor have sprung up in major metropolitan areas worldwide, but some of you in the more rural areas may have forgotten. (Once again, those bastards at Old Farmer's Almanac neglected to print my birthday in their calendar).
Feel free to send me birthday wishes. And by birthday wishes, I mean gold bars and candy.
--opus
posted by opus at
11:47 AM
I May Have Been Flipped Off By Paris Hilton
Driving home from work on Friday was, as always, a chore. Traffic gets snarled at the intersection of Santa Monica Boulevard and Wilshire Boulevard, in Beverly Hills.
When I finally made it to this intersection, a huge Mercedes SUV was just hangin' out in the middle of the intersection. It looked like it was going to make a U-Turn, but then didn't have enough room to go. Now the driver just decided to wait out the next light in the middle of the intersection, effectively blocking all traffic in my lane.
I gave a small, angry honk as I pulled around. From the passenger's side, a gaunt blonde face stared at my angrily and gave me the finger. As I drove away, I thought, "My god... Paris Hilton just gave me the finger."
To be fair, it's hard to recognize her when she's not in "night-vision" mode. And considering that Beverly Hills is infested with vain anorexic rich blonde girls, it may not have been her.
But if it was you, Paris, I wish I could have returned the finger. Next time, I promise.
--opus
posted by opus at
12:12 PM
09/21/2003 - 09/27/2003 09/28/2003 - 10/04/2003 10/05/2003 - 10/11/2003 10/12/2003 - 10/18/2003 10/19/2003 - 10/25/2003 10/26/2003 - 11/01/2003 11/02/2003 - 11/08/2003 11/09/2003 - 11/15/2003 11/16/2003 - 11/22/2003 11/23/2003 - 11/29/2003 11/30/2003 - 12/06/2003 12/07/2003 - 12/13/2003 12/14/2003 - 12/20/2003 12/21/2003 - 12/27/2003 12/28/2003 - 01/03/2004 01/04/2004 - 01/10/2004 01/11/2004 - 01/17/2004 01/18/2004 - 01/24/2004 01/25/2004 - 01/31/2004 02/01/2004 - 02/07/2004 02/08/2004 - 02/14/2004 02/15/2004 - 02/21/2004 02/22/2004 - 02/28/2004 02/29/2004 - 03/06/2004 03/07/2004 - 03/13/2004 03/14/2004 - 03/20/2004 03/21/2004 - 03/27/2004 03/28/2004 - 04/03/2004 04/04/2004 - 04/10/2004 04/11/2004 - 04/17/2004 04/25/2004 - 05/01/2004 05/02/2004 - 05/08/2004 05/09/2004 - 05/15/2004 05/23/2004 - 05/29/2004 05/30/2004 - 06/05/2004 06/06/2004 - 06/12/2004 06/13/2004 - 06/19/2004 06/20/2004 - 06/26/2004 06/27/2004 - 07/03/2004 07/04/2004 - 07/10/2004 07/11/2004 - 07/17/2004 07/25/2004 - 07/31/2004 08/01/2004 - 08/07/2004 08/08/2004 - 08/14/2004 08/15/2004 - 08/21/2004 08/22/2004 - 08/28/2004 08/29/2004 - 09/04/2004 09/12/2004 - 09/18/2004 09/19/2004 - 09/25/2004 09/26/2004 - 10/02/2004 10/03/2004 - 10/09/2004 10/10/2004 - 10/16/2004 10/17/2004 - 10/23/2004 10/24/2004 - 10/30/2004 10/31/2004 - 11/06/2004 11/07/2004 - 11/13/2004 11/14/2004 - 11/20/2004 11/21/2004 - 11/27/2004 12/05/2004 - 12/11/2004 12/19/2004 - 12/25/2004 01/09/2005 - 01/15/2005 01/30/2005 - 02/05/2005 02/06/2005 - 02/12/2005 02/13/2005 - 02/19/2005 02/20/2005 - 02/26/2005 02/27/2005 - 03/05/2005 03/06/2005 - 03/12/2005 03/13/2005 - 03/19/2005 03/20/2005 - 03/26/2005 04/03/2005 - 04/09/2005
